I met her on probation with Merv Griffin
I can still recall those training pants she wore
She was drinkin' Dr. Pepper near Poughkeepsie,
and I knew we really lost the last World War;
The blood test showed I'd stay with her forever;
She said to me there was no other guy;
But who'd have thought she'd boogie on a surfboard;
I pushed her off the bridge and waved goodbye.